I Have A Story To Tell

I Have A Story To Tell

by Sacred Mother Tribe October 2018

She felt heartache, devastation
and loss were her best friends.

She was devastatingly beautiful
wise, magical and powerful 
however she had no voice.

She will rise in her own way as we all do.

I have a story to tell.

I'm afraid to say the truth. 
I'm afraid to feel. 
I'm trying to walk through my life unscathed. 

All my excuses are bullshit. 
Myself is gone. 
I've felt number so long.

I have a story to tell.

I wonder
“Why does she feel like she is
In siberia?”
Why the sleep karma?
Why do I keep not dying? 
And, How can someone stab themselves in the heart seven times? 

Do I need the physical pain
to validate my emotional pain?

You have faith in abundance. 
I do not want.

I have a story to tell.

You know who I am. 
When I disappoint others, I want to fix it. 
or crawl in a hole. 
or make excuses.

I should have fessed up

that I couldn't understand.

Perhaps cussing out 
the mother fucking terrorist.
Is better than acknowledging
His name.

I have a story to tell.

I'm afraid to be myself.
Dog doesn't question it,
no overthinking, 
no second-guessing. 

Sometimes their pain is still too much 
for me to ignore. 
I need to acknowledge it
in order to let it go. 

I need to embody the dog; 
it's a simple and lovely way to be. 
It is the truest expression if you ask me.

I have a story to tell.

Roots coming down from the soles of my feet.
Locating in the entirety of my experience
only then extending outward.

Only then. 

Peaceful state of self.
A rewrite of history.

I have a story to tell.

I put myself there. 
I walked there not knowing 
where I would go or what I would see. 
I only knew to follow the 
Stars and believe. 

Connection happens best in stillness